Change

Although have been absent from (writing) blogs for quite a while something clicked while watching the movie "Gandhi" on Sony Pix. Certain things which like

1. The roads that we have today are still the same as it was during his time .. Dusty and potholed

2. Villages are still the same .. offlimit ... hard to reach .. haven't changed even with our own country (wo)men ruling us

3. The rulers .. they are looking similar to what we had at that time ..

4. Media still reports only what it wants (asked) to report.

5. Women are still carrying water on their head from far.

During my school days i had read a story "Namak Ka Daroga" by Premchand. This was in Hindi and part of our course, The story was set in pre-independence days to highlight the prevalent corruption we had in government. How a Daroga catches a very rich man smuggling salt. Very soon almost everyone from courts to his seniors get into an overdrive to save the rich guy. Finally the Daroga gets dumped. Contrast this with what we see today. I am pretty sure the outcome would still be the same. The honest Daroga will still get dumped.

The first month: Renting a house

Now that I have spent almost a month after returning and have almost secured a house on rent (This was a big achievement for me in last one month). This was certainly an achievement after seeing almost 25-30 houses of all types. Although I consider myself very experienced in searching a house on rent ( have done it in most of the metros except Chennai ) still I received some very very useful tips by a friend of mine who accompanied me on many of my house hunting 'expeditions'. Most of these are tested with real situations.

1. Never say that you have returned back to India from outside. If asked mention some Indian city from where you are getting re-located. Most importantly do have a phone number from that city where anyone can call and inquire for you. Explain the person who might have to answer the call about you that they should never mention anything about outside India. Otherwise any such mention will just make either the deposit or the rent or both double.

2. When asked, quote the lowest possible budget for rent to the brokers. This will make them explain you that it’s very very difficult to get a decent house in that budget in that locality and also very important is to allow them to advice you to consider some other localities. Once they have talked at length about other options ask them to look something in your budget in the area that you initially asked. Do not assure that your budget can go up .. give him hope by saying that please show me the house first.

3. The broker will ask if you are ok with a fully furnished house at a higher rent. Remember fully furnished houses are not very common in India and also mostly available in a very up-scale end of the market. This is yet another question to gauge your 'haisiyat'.

4. To the house owners or to the brokers maintain your 'deen-heen-awastha' . Bargain .. Make a poker face and quote the half of the rent that the owner has asked. Be ready to be thrown out or for situations where owners turning impolite to you.

5. Never fail to 're-visit' the same house from where you were thrown out two days back. Inquire owner’s health .. weather .. but do not talk about the house again.

6. Mention your company as you will be asked but never mention what you do there. Keep mentioning lowest end of the ladder to everyone without mentioning your salary or your designation. Now for salary part, its tricky as after mentioning that the owner might pity you (most of the time he would be earning far more than you with what would seem to be no-work for him at all) or in certain cases might discourage you from renting his/her house and can advice you some cheaper options that he knows.

7. Always maintain a poker face and even if you like the house try to find faults. Beat it down.

8. Count rooms carefully.

9. Don't get into Vastu stories. This one comes from a similar house hunting experience we had in Bangalore. Where we went to see a house(Flat) in BTM layout near that Bannerghata road. This guy showed us three rooms and he counted them as well. Then we realized that the third room looks a bit small.. also one of the friend remembered that he didn't notice any 'balcony' as it was on third floor so we inquired the owner .. pet came the reply .. actually saar according to vastu the 'balcony' was not good for house so we closed it and converted that into a room. So is it a four room flat ... no saar the third room was the 'balcony' we converted it into room so that you can have complete peace of mind... aayio and 2k extra as rent for your peace of mind ..

10. Discuss and ask again and again .. as after lot of questioning one owner mentioned that he might require one of the rooms for few days in a month as his mother is old and is on some type of medicine and she is staying in some other place and visits to see the doctor. just couldn't ask why can't his mother stay with him/his family.

11. No matter what the owner will always slip-in something into the contract to keep you un-comfortable and then blame it on the lawyer who wrote that. But then they would not like you to propose another lawyer.

12. Most of them would not be very keen to give you rent receipts and would slip in very innocent looking lines .. I do not like keeping papers so you can e-transfer it into my mom/wife's account so that even you will have a record in your bank statement. They would not like you to ask so who owns the house its you or your wife/mom. If you own the house then how can I pay rent to your wife and then how should I show my e-transfers to income tax department as they still like to get papers as proof of rent.

13. No one wants to discuss the pending electricity bills. It will be dealt with sweeping statements like yes yes we are very very prompt with all our bills.

14. Check the loos carefully. During my expeditions saw a house which had one washroom with both types of commodes, which the broker mentioned as .. saar two proper commodes English as well as Indian ... but forgot to mention that they are co-located as if you get bored reading news on the English one then put the paper on that and then move to the Indian one without changing the room or anyone knowing outside.

15. Never get lured by any mention of society or club. They are common tools to justify the price. Swimming pool is even bigger wastage as no-one would be changing the waters regularly and remember a great man once said 'a Gentleman is one who comes out of bath to pee' but then there are very few gentlemen.

16. You might have to appear for interviews to check if you are suitable to stay in that society or not. In one house the owner had gone out and had left the task to find a renter to his brother who was staying in the same apartment. That guy showed me the house and then started reeling off the rules of the society. Then he mentioned that I will have to appear for an interview in front of society members and then they will decide if I am suitable enough to stay or not. I wondered if he really wanted to rent that house (as the money would go to his brother ) or just happy to report back to his bro that he is not able to find a 'suitable-match' for the house.

17. Never discuss politics with owner or the broker.

18. The biggest NO. Never look (normal indian stare) at the lady (wife/sister/daughter or anyone ) in the house even if she is really beautiful. If you get the house you will get more chances so don't try to maximize your benefits in the first meeting itself. Never ever try to impress ladies while you are searching a house. There are execptions to this rule but they are too few to take a chance.

19. Show respect for father-in-laws. As there are chances that the house that you want might have been 'gifted' to him by his father-in-law.

20. Check the surroundings. As for one house the broker said .. saar very beautiful view from balcony saar .. you will see lake with good greenery saar ... now what he didn't say that the lake was actually a pond and people who do not have a comfort of a walled area for bath will be taking bath there throughout the day and also your laundary-wala would be washing your cloths in front of your eyes. It might be appealing if you want to do research on bathing habit of people.

On a break!!

Sometime back had decided to return back to India before it gets too late .. so will be away from blogs while i make the journey back home and settle myself back into the daily life of 'home'.

The tough achievers

One of the most positive stories that I have read in recent times. From India-Today. Highly recommended. Hats off to their perseverance and dedication.

Even though the number of seats has gone up multiple folds and the question papers have changed and people cry of dilution in the brand but I would bet that still only those go through the toughest exam who really deserve it. And the seats and number of IITs should have increased long time back.

This reminds me of a conversation I had with a Taxi driver in Kolkata. as we(me and my wife) jumped into one of those big Ambassador taxies in Kolkata i was greeted with one of the 'whom-I-thought-was-very-talkative' taxi drivers.

He was around 45-50 and had lot of question for me like what do we do, after that what have I studied, a bit surprising was when he asked my branch. Then he asked if I am happy with my job and would I recommend others similar job as mine... I was very amused with all these questions and his keen interest in keeping the conversation going So I asked him on how he is very conversant with all this.

His answer was 'mera ladka bhi engineering me hai (my son is doing engineering)

I was impressed.. then asked him where is he .. wo sir IIT kanpur me hai (he is studying at IIT Kanpur).

I was at the edge of my seat leaning on the front seat .. ohh kis branch me hai (whats is branch) .. wo electrical me hai (he is in electrical) .. wow .. means must be under 200AIR.

Then rest of our discussion focused on me asking him how his son studied. Where did he do the schooling.. and all that .. and most of the answers where 'wo padhta tha aur hum to bas help karte the' and with us now rather than a Taxi driver there a was proud father who can keep talking for hours about his son and his achievements.

By the time we reached our destination we were really feeling very very happy and were proud to meet him.

For respecting individual rights!!

A bit of contradictions. Recently French President Mr. Sarkozy's remarks on Burqa. Quoted from TOI article

"We cannot accept to have in our country women who are prisoners behind netting, cut off from all social life, deprived of identity," he said. "That is not the idea that the French republic has of women's dignity."

Another one exact opposite to this remark was made by President Obama in his speech in Cairo. Again quoting form the full text of speech in Guardian

"That is why the US government has gone to court to protect the right of women and girls to wear the hijab, and to punish those who would deny it."

Interestingly all this sounds from a different world when we have in India debates on Western vs Indian cloths. But then most of us restrict ourselves to comparing only Western vs sarees.

A very good article by TOI on the same subject.

"In a world where sexual-crime is rampant, the burqa denotes comfort, security and allows a woman her dignity, they say. "

"Denying that the burqa has any oppressive value to it, they say modern burqas are quite fashionable, with gems and jewels embroidered on them. Fancy ones can be priced as much as Rs 50,000, and these aren't the bridal ones."

Edited to add: just a thought in my mind. Do maulavis approve of Valentine Day or if Bajrang Dal has a company from the other side of spectrum?

Anybody can be a father ... but it takes somebody to be a DAD!!

Among the lot of junk mails that daily clutters my mailbox one really caught my eye. Now this one was from the Indian phone company whose services i use for my international calls.

The subject line said "Anybody can be a Father...but it takes somebody to be a DAD!"

Apparently we even have a Father's Day now and the mail was a failed attempt to sell me something for my dad for Father’s Day. On a footnote looks like we will need to redefine our relationship as I have never wished Father’s day to him and I suspect he remains as ignorant as he is on these special days.

For me the most catchy part remained the subject line which was not making any sense to me .. "Anybody can be a father ... but it takes somebody to be a DAD"

Who is a father and who is a DAD?

And what happens to those Appa, Babuji, Pitaji variety? Where do they fall in? But then marketers probably think that it will take sometime before they are ready to target that segment. As usual they would be laggards.

In and out of our workplace we get loads of jargons ... very often you hear someone saying "we need a paradigm shift" .. or "we need to pull right value drivers/levers" ... or even better combining multiple of them like "we need to organize ourselves to bring innovation and be in a position to pull right value drivers" .. a more simpler but often used is "we need to think out-of-box on this one"

To me these sentences never sounded English and very often i do not resist the temptation of stopping the speakers and asking them meaning of these sentences. Very often i find an annoyed look or even more 'un'-english answer.

But then again for me such meetings remain fun as they provide loads of laughter once you are out of those meetings .. paradigm shift .. huh!! .. value drivers .. wow!!

It was the same puzzled moment for me through that mail. My first reaction was to write a mail back to them asking them the difference between father and a dad .. but somehow i didn't ..

Looks like your 'DADness' would be lot low if you do not get lot of gifts from your sonny/daughters .. unless the juniors spend loads of money on buying gifts fathers can not claim to be dads ... and ofcourse they need to be marked for father’s day.

I think Doors had the same thought when they wrote that line in their song 'The End' .. “Father, yes son, I want to kill you” .. I guess their father was not enough DAD!

AP:crimes against women & PCC

This news was well tucked into multiple folds. Lucky(sic) me to have spotted that.

Immediately i thought of calling the PCC (Pink Chaddi Campaigns) brigade. For uninitiated more info on PCC here & here

Mangalore happened. Someone arranged for a TV crew at a pub and started beating up women. We discovered that we have a group called Sree Ram Sene(SRS) and all 'forward' women devised a 'fool'-proof plan and ran a PCC. Media called for shame shame for SRS. Minister shouted Taliban. Some other shouted for reports from State Govt. Media again shouted how the reports are needed.

PCC was a success. Blogs were running pink. We showed our affinity to pink. The 'beautiful people' were talking pink and declared how SRS need to be 'pinked' and put behind the bars so that we can freely walk into the pubs.

Switch to AP. lets quote from Article

"Sri Laxmi, Lakshmi Sujatha, Ayesha Meera, Bhargavi, Swapnika and now, Sameera. Brutal and savage attacks on women are happening in the State in quick succession. The reasons might differ but in most cases, women are victimised by the lovelorn or the greedy."

The war cry: Bring on the PCC. Lets teach these attackers a lesson.

Hang on!! how about answering these questions first to see if PCC really applies in this case or not,

• Do we really need to pay attention to these as have they stopped any women from going to pub.
• Isn't that state ruled by a good government who are pillers of secularism.
• How can we dub these attacks as Talibanization .. naah.. Mangalore was as they attacked women in pub that too they had arranged a camera before attacking them so that we can see them and then 'pink' them.
• These attackers are not even arranging for a camera before they attack. how can we ascertain their crimes.
• Lets find out if these attackers shout 'that ugly H' word or not. How can we do a PCC if they are just attacking and not shouting that ugly word.
• Looks like they are just petty criminals as they do not even shout 'H' word.
• Has SRS reached AP? you do not know? then how can we run PCC? Let SRS reach AP. Let them own up responsibility for any/few of these attacks then we will run PCC.

I am still searching for answers. Till then you can read on further quoted from the main article and prey that SRS owns some of them so that we can send the saviors for women in AP as well

"As per the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) statistics published in 2007-08, AP is `a highly unsafe state for women.’ The State topped the list of crimes against women with 24,783 cases, accounting for 13 per cent of the total incidents in 2007. Of these, 3,316 cases were sexual harassment cases putting AP on top of other states.

The State has also accounted for about 83 per cent (about 1,000 cases) of the total cases against indecent representation of women. Among 35 cities with a population of more than one million, Hyderabad recorded 1,755 cases next to New Delhi which registered highest cases of crimes against women - 4,134 cases.

About 13,000 cases on human rights violation against women are still pending in Andhra Pradesh."

I am planning to call up some of my friends in AP to check if any of these are remotely associated with attacks in pubs or near the pubs.

[I have no intension for 'jibe' as these are serious crimes but could not resist the contrast]